March 25, 2018

OrangeVerse XXXII: H.R. 1625

No time for Sunday School today -- I was busy reading poetry and stuff.

As you know the president signed H.R. 1625 on Friday.  H.R. is the $1.3 trillion spending bill, as you know, and you also likely know that the president threatened to veto this HR, just as he vetoed his National Security Advisor, HR McMaster, the day before

Anyway, in addition to have a couple of his cabinet folks drop a few words in the 22 minutes or so of  remarks, it was all Trump, in all his I-wish-I-had-a-uniform glory.  Let's take a look at how he views his spending plan.

Wanna Trade?
Thank you very much, everybody.
We have a lot of good news
 to report. Some 
tremendous trade deals
are being made
with various countries. 
We're negotiating
very long, very hard, but
very quickly.
And the deal with South Korea
according to Secretary Ross and
Bob Lighthizer, is very close
to being finished.
And we're going to have
a wonderful deal with a
wonderful ally.

Um, I Think We've Moved On.
The last time we negotiated
something like this -
and as you know it's
always been a problem for our country.
They get together and
they crate a series of
documents that nobody has
been able to read
because it was just done.
Now you tell me who can read
that quickly. It takes a 
long time to read it.

Hallowed be Thy Readiness
For the last eight years
deep defense cuts have
undermined our national security, 
hallowed our - and they just  -
if you look at what's taken out,
they've hallowed our 
readiness
as a military unit
And put America at
really grave
risk.
My highest duty is
to keep America safe.
Nothing more important.
The omnibus bill
reverses this dangerous defense.
As crazy as it's been
As difficult as it's been
As much opposition
to the military as we've had
from the Democrats
and it has been tremendous.

Listen... Listen
I try to explain to them,
you know the military
is for Republicans
and Democrats
and everybody else.
It's for everybody.
But w have tremendous
opposition to creating, 
really what will be 
by far - by far
 the strongest 
military that we've 
ever had.
We've had that
from the Democrats.
So if we take something
for the military, 
they want something for
in many cases
things that are really
a wasted sum
of money and it's not right
and it's very bad for our country.

This Land is Our Land
We're looking to do funding
for our final fight
in certain areas
As you know
we've gotten just about
a hundred percent or
our land
back from ISIS.
We have troop increases
necessary to accomplish what
we have to do and we have
very importantly a pay increase
for our troops. And this will
be actually the largest pay increase 
for our incredible people
in over a decade.

We're All Building The Navy Submarines, the Navy Submarines...
It increases total defense spending 
by more than $60B from last year 
and funds the addition of critically
needed ships planes helicopters tanks 
and submarines.
We have submarines being built
the lines of which there's
nothing anywhere in the world like
the submarines we build...

First and Last Times
But I say to Congress: I will
never sign another bill
like this again.
I'm not
going to do it again.
Nobody read it
It's only 
hours old...but 
in this case, it
became so big because 
we need to take care of 
our military and because
the Democrats
who don't believe in that
added things that
they wanted in there 
in order to get votes.

Full-o-bluster
We have to get rid of
the filibuster rule.
We have to get rid of
the filibuster rule
and go to 51 votes
 in the Senate
if we're going to have
really sustained
continued success.
To prevent the omnibus situation
from every happening again
I'm calling on Congress
to give me a line-item veto
for all government spending
bills and the Senate must end.

Poof!
They must end
the filibuster rule
and get down to work.
We have to get a lot of
great legislation approved
and without the
filibuster rule
it will happen just like magic.

I'm going to end it there, even though there was more after that, including the president itemizing our military spending - this many dollars for this type of equipment, and this many dollars for some other equipment, and nuclear subs, and on and on.  And of course, the border wall. And the military being the strongest it's ever been, the most well funded it's ever been, and oh yeah, we have a great country.

The only thing missing? #MAGA. 

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