TGIF 4/24/20

Hey - look - another Friday. How about that?

We're going to take a slightly different path this week, because I happened to hear someone mention comments made by Piers Morgan about Donald Trump. I was fascinated by the paraphrasing of Morgan's remarks, and I was fortunate that there's a transcript.

Morgan, the person who was telling the story, is one of 47 accounts the president follows on Twitter -- so he's definitely part of the 'in crowd'.  Or, more accurately, he was of the in crowd, and he was one of the 47 lucky accounts Trump follows -- but not any more, at least not as I write this. Because now there are 46, and Morgan isn't one of them.

What did the Brit say that got appear to have gotten him in hot water? Among other things, that he has "been watching these daily briefings with mounting horror, frankly, because this is not what presidents should be doing."

Presidents, Morgan said, have to "be calm, they've got to show authority, they have to be honest, they have to be accurate, entirely factual with what they're telling the people and they have to have an ability to show empathy." And, "on almost every level of that, Donald Trump at the moment is failing the American people." 

It's important to note that Morgan's comments came before yesterday's allegedly joking, sarcastic comments from the president, which we'll get to in a sec.  But first, more Morgan.

Donald Trump's approval ratings are falling and the reason for that is -- he needs to understand this -- they're falling because people don't trust him. They think he's turning these rallies -- these daily briefings into self-serving rallies, and they don't understand why he can't just do the basics of crisis leadership, which is to make the public come with you, and to believe you, and to feel that you're on their side and you're showing them the empathy that they need when so many people are dying.

Attacking Trump's ratings? That's like the third rail of being a Trump friend, I think. But that wasn't all.

Donald Trump, if he's listening to this or watching, you will win the election in November if you get this right. If you stop making it about yourself and make it about the American people and show that you care about them over yourself, you will win. And, conversely, you will lose the election in November if you continue to make it about yourself, you continue playing silly politics, continue targeting Democrat governors because that suits you for your electoral purposes. None of that matters.

Now, it would appear that Morgan did not make these comments in jest, and it wasn't a really bad attempt at sarcasm. We know this, because he hasn't retracted the comments. And he won't. Because, well, because he has courage, and convictions.

Whereas the president has zero courage, zero convictions, and absolutely no sense of humor. Because apparently, when the backlash struck today, the comments below were said to have been sarcasm.

THE PRESIDENT:  Thank you very much.  So I asked Bill a question that probably some of you are thinking of, if you’re totally into that world, which I find to be very interesting.  So, supposing we hit the body with a tremendous — whether it’s ultraviolet or just very powerful light — and I think you said that that hasn’t been checked, but you’re going to test it.  And then I said, supposing you brought the light inside the body, which you can do either through the skin or in some other way, and I think you said you’re going to test that too.  It sounds interesting.

ACTING UNDER SECRETARY BRYAN:  We’ll get to the right folks who could.

THE PRESIDENT:  Right.  And then I see the disinfectant, where it knocks it out in a minute.  One minute.  And is there a way we can do something like that, by injection inside or almost a cleaning.  Because you see it gets in the lungs and it does a tremendous number on the lungs.  So it would be interesting to check that.  So, that, you’re going to have to use medical doctors with.  But it sounds — it sounds interesting to me. So we’ll see.  But the whole concept of the light, the way it kills it in one minute, that’s — that’s pretty powerful.

So, the official White House transcript shows that the president was addressing his remarks to Acting Undersecretary Bill Bryan, who "leads the Science and Technology Directorate at the Department of Homeland Security..." - and yet, here's what the president said today about those remarks.

I was asking a question sarcastically to reporters like you just to see what would happen,

He's a liar, the president is, as we know. And he's proved that again, as he does regularly. There should be no doubt about that, although I can't imagine how there has been any doubt about that for the past nearly five years - or more.

So, how does all of this tie to our usual TGIF theme? Well, I 'm saying Piers Morgan had a good week, and the president had his typical week, which is usually a bad one. He's among the usual suspects for that dubious honor.

Now, in the interest of something that was actually intended as a joke, and is not true and is completely ridiculous, I offer these remarks, which are funnier if you read them with Trump's voice in your head.

See, you go into the spray tan booth, but instead of spraying you gently with that orange dye, they'll turn up the pressure and blast you at the SAME time with both the UV light AND the disinfectant - at the same time, can you believe it?

The spray will be SO POWERFUL that it will penetrate your skin, and the light will get in there, and the disinfectant will get in there, and it will be like a BEAUTIFUL cleanse - so important, doing the cleanse. Doing the cleanse. And think of it - your pores will be opened up just like our beautiful ECONOMY, the greatest economy EVER, they tell me. Best ever. Even bigger pores, even bigger economy than ever before, even bigger. So important.

And JOBS! Think of all the JOBS, good old American jobs, that's right! We'll buy American UV lightbulbs, made right here in the US, they're going to reopen the plants and make the bulbs, not the orange ones that make me look bad, the good ones, the great US made UV bulbs, only the best and we'll make the disinfectant too.

I can use the D, I'll invoke the D, like never before, nothing like this before, we'll get those factories, GM will get those old factories open again, the people working again, good American people, good American jobs for the bulbs and the spray and the disinfectant, the best in the world. So important, the best in the world. No one can make the bulbs and the disinfectant like we can. 

Like I always say, #BuyAmerican and #HireAmerican, so important, so beautiful. It's going to be beautiful, and clean, so clean. 

TGIF everyone - whether you're kidding, not kidding, being sarcastic, or just plain being honest. Which, as we know, is the best policy. As is washing your hands and keeping your distance. Even from nice people like me.