January 22, 2017

Size Really Doesn't Matter, Mr. Trump

Dear President Trump,

We know you think size matters, bigly.

We know you have yuge hands, and we know that there's no trouble down there in the nether regions - because you told us so yourself, and you also told us you'd never lie to us, so it must be true.

We know you're a billionaire ten times over, you have the biggest pile of money, because you told us so.

We know that you have yuge ratings, because you told us so, when you tweeted to let us know that the TV show that brought you to prominence got better ratings when you were on it than it does with the new guy.

We know you have a yuge ego, because even though you're the executive producer, you had no qualms about bashing your own product to let us know how much better it was when you were there than it is now that you're President.

We know your movement like nothing anyone in the world has ever seen is yuge, because you told us so, and that anyone or anything that disagrees with you is fake news, because you've let us know repeatedly that all news you don't like or doesn't like you is fake news.

We know the problems of our country are so huge, and so horrid, that only you can fix them, because you told us so, repeatedly.

We know the crowd at your inaugural is the biggest one ever, because you told us so. We know the TV ratings for your inauguration was the biggest one ever, because you told us so.

We know that the whole world is conspiring against you to make it look like everything you think is bigly yuge is not, because you told us so.

We know that everyone who disagrees with you is bigly over-rated, yugely not funny, biglyyugely not as big as you in whatever way they might think they're bigger or you might think they're smaller.

We know that you're not the bigly most unliked president ever inaugurated, because you told us the polls lie, like the election was rigged until you won, and then it was the best biggest most impressive election ever and there was no rigging. We get that, because you said so.

Yes we know all of this because you show and tell us, every day, often many times a day, bigly, and yugely, like David Gest telling us how he was beaten by Liza Minelli over and over and over.

We get it -- size matters to you. Bigly.

But you know what really matters?

You are the freaking President of the United States.  

You are no longer the host of the Celebrity Apprentice. You are no longer the darling of the Access Hollywood Bus. You are no longer the Talk of the Town. You are no longer a great guest on the Howard Stern Show.

It's time to get your big hair and your big hands and your big tie and your big ego and your big ratings and your big popular vote loss and your big electoral college win focused on being the leader of the free world - no matter how many people aren't watching.

Stop worrying about your goddam ratings and who draws bigger crowds.

Get over it, already.

January 21, 2017

#NeverTrump Answers to #TrumpVoter Questions

It's January 21, 2017 and it appears that at least a very vocal, and, it seems, a very large percentage of Trump voters are stuck in a 'sore winners' rut and don't know how to get out of it. Which means I guess it's up to people like me, a #NeverTrump, to try and help them out.

Wish me luck.

Q: Are you lumping all Trump supporters into one bucket with this post?
A: No, I'm not.  As noted in the very first sentence, I reference "a very vocal, and it seems a very large percentage" of Trump voters. Only you can decide whether that includes you.

Q: Right. Just like Hillary Clinton called all of us Trump supporters deplorables. You're all alike.
A: So, she didn't call all of you deplorables. It might make you feel better to think that she did, but she actually said it was half of you. The other half, she said,
are people who feel that the government has let them down, the economy has let them down, nobody cares about them, nobody worries about what happens to their lives and their futures, and they're just desperate for change. It doesn't really even matter where it comes from. They don't buy everything he says but he seems to hold out some hope that their lives will be different. They won't wake up and see their jobs disappear, lose a kid to heroin, feel like they're in a dead-end. Those are people we have to understand and empathize with as well. 
If you consider yourself in the deplorable half, rather than in the desperate-for-change half, that's up to you.

Q: Whatever. Why do you non-Trump people want the President to fail?
A: I can only speak for myself, but while I didn't want him to be President, and I am embarrassed that he is President, I never once said I want him to fail. The truth is, I desperately want him to rise to the occasion.

Q: It sure seems like you want him to fail. You can't stop complaining about him. Why are you Clinton fans such sore losers?
A: Aha! Do you really think everyone who is #NeverTrump is #AlwaysHillary or something? You can't be serious!

Q: Then why do you protest so much? Trump won!
A: That's correct - he did. But I read his policies, his speeches, I watched the debates, I continue to follow him on social media, and based on what he says he stands for, I could not in good conscience support him. I disagree with his vision of and for America; I disagree with him and his positions on many issues that are important to me, and because of his feelings about sexual assault, I could never vote for him for anything. None of which has anything to do with Hillary Clinton.

Q: You liberals are full of it. He didn't say anything more than any other guy says all the time. And where were you when Bill Clinton was messing around with Monica Lewinsky in the White House? And where were you when Hillary Clinton was attacking the women who accused her husband?
A: I can't prove it to you, because we didn't have social media back in the 1990's when Clinton was impeached for his actions, but I can assure you I found his behavior disgusting and beneath the office he held. I cannot speak to why Hillary stayed with him or why she defended him. You'll have to ask her that.

Q: Trump was just talking, he never did anything. And besides, he said that a long time ago.
A: Well, no, if you listen to the tape, Trump didn't say "I wish I could..." do anything I want, including forcibly kissing women and grabbing them by the vagina. He said he DID it. I did not consider Bill Clinton's behavior when assessing Donald Trump's behavior, and I'm not sure why you would want me to - particularly when, as I noted above, Bill Clinton was president in the 1990s and the election was in 2016. Certainly if I should forgive Trump for his behavior in 2005, I cannot be expected to judge Hillary Clinton on what she did, felt, or said a decade earlier, right?

Q: Why are you protesting? Why can't you just accept the fact that you lost?
A: I do accept the fact that, against my best wishes and best judgment, Trump won. However, the America I love fully supports me protesting the government and protesting people who don't agree with me.

Q: Well, what's the point of protesting? It's not going to do any good anyway. Why don't you just get over it?
A: Because I was raised to participate in our political process. That means that I vote. That means I decide what issues are important to me, and I educate myself on the candidates themselves as well as their positions, and make my decision based on that research. It also means that I try and hold my elected officials accountable. That's what I'm supposed to do. You do think it's OK to hold them accountable, right?

Q: I don't understand what you hope to accomplish. You're not going to change anyone's mind.
A: And similarly, I have to wonder what you hope to accomplish by trying to shut me down, and shut me up. How do you benefit by everyone going along with you, and with Trump?

Q: Well, he's only going to be successful if we stop arguing and come together.
A: Actually, he's only going to be successful is his administration does the right thing for America. But if you think the only way he's going to be successful is if we all stop arguing, why don't you stop arguing with me, and instead join me in trying to hold him and the rest of our elected officials accountable to all of us?

Q: I don't have to agree with you - you lost. You should support him. We're all Americans, we need to stick together.
A: Let me ask you this. Say you're a huge SU basketball fan, your whole life you've been an SU hoops fan, way back to when you were a kid. Did you stop being an SU fan when John Thompson declared "Manley Field House is officially closed?" Or did you keep being an SU fan and root even harder for them every time they played, and especially every time they played Georgetown? Pretty sure the answer to that would be you fought harder for your team. So why are you asking me to give up my deeply held beliefs and become a Trump fan?

Q: Well that silly. That's a sports team. We're talking about our country here.
A: Why yes, yes we are. Which is why it's even more confusing that you would want me to set aside things I believe in to support a person I find disgusting, unethical, uninformed, and completely unprepared to lead our country.

Q: Well, you say all of those things about Donald Trump, what about Hillary Clinton? She's a liar, corrupt, she's killed 50 people, her email server was hacked, Benghazi? What about all of that?
A: See, again, I've not mentioned Hillary Clinton as a reason for being #NeverTrump and I've not mentioned her as a reason for my protesting him. It seems the only person mentioning Hillary Clinton or anyone other than Donald Trump is you and others who are complaining about me and others protesting.

Q: Yeah, well, those protesters set fires and broke windows and terrorized people. They need to go to jail. Those are your 'protesters.'
A: Some 200, maybe 220 people were arrested for setting fires and breaking windows and rioting. Which is exactly what should have happened. But they do not represent me, or anyone else I know who marches, protests on social media, or writes their elected officials to protest bills that are proposed, or anything else like that. Why do you put all of us in the same bucket, when you complain so much about us supposedly doing that to you? Remember that whole deplorables thing we talked about...

Q: Well, you didn't disavow them. I don't see you telling everyone you think they were wrong.
A: I'm sorry, but you must not be paying attention; I've said that repeatedly, in public, about what happened yesterday in DC. But can I ask you a question?
  • Did you disavow Donald Trump when he made his comments about Mexican immigrants being rapists, drug dealers and the like? Or about banning all Muslims from entering the country? 
  • Or about the "Mexican" judge who was being unfair to him in the Trump University case?
  • About women, whether he was talking about Rosie O'Donnell or not? 
  • Or when the white supremacists supported him? And the KKK? 
  • Did you disavow his attack on the Khans, the Gold Star family he attacked on Twitter and Fox News - for days? 
  • How about when he called for his follows to boycott Macy's, and when he took credit for the falling fortunes of this American company that employs American workers? 
  • Or when he mocked the disabled reporter, and pretended he didn't even know him?
  • Or, of course, when he made his pussy-grabbing comments?
I never saw you disavow any of that, and as we've discussed, you defended his comments about sexual assault as "nothing more than any other guy says" so you must think all of this stuff is OK.

Q: That's ridiculous. What makes you think I agree with everything he says?
A: Exactly -- so what makes you think I agree with looting and rioting, or why would you think they represent me?

Q: Everyone just chill out. People need to just chill out.
A: You are absolutely right. People need to just chill out. Let me know when you're going to start.

Q: I'm not the one with the problem, I'm not the one protesting the election.
A: Nor am I protesting the election. I'm protesting the policies, statements, ethics and character of the person who won.

Q: Well you need to just get over it.
A: And you need to just get used to it. Because I'm not going to stop.

Q: Yeah, well that's bullshit.
A: Right back atcha.